Reunion time

I know that I sounds like a broken record but i am going through the motions this weekend that i really am at a lost as of to jump off a cliff or go and hide, my side of the family does a reunion every odd year in July and it happens to be that time of the month for it ....Over 100 people in the same area trying to get along for three day UGH...And my wife tells me at the last moment that she needs to work and that in order for her to keep her in home job they are giving her a transfer and that she needs to work all she can until the 9th of July. Not only do i feel ALONE at home with my kids i am really feeling alone now , the kids and i are heading to this reunion with out her and she gets to stay home for four days by her self ...I love my family don't get me wrong , its just the fact that they do all have amazing relationships with there spouses and there is nothing left inside of me for mine..I really dont know where i went wrong with my wife and losing T at the same time , I have decided that i wasnt going to text T anymore and that i was going to let it all go. The pain insde is too deep and i just need to let it all go and move on and if there is no Love after this then I guess that i will take it as that , but one day at a time ....Do i let the fact of my wife staying home slip by of make it a way of being the bad guy and blame her for not attending this ...UGH !!!! Good times